I get knocked down…

On a roller coaster of emotions and exhaustion after the last week. Closing Mum’s house for the final time before we sell it to pay for her care, results of scans (good) and then a heart scare, now under control.

Gradually unpacking the stuff I brought back from Mum’s and it’s strange to see everything in a different context, my home now, not Mum’s. Shredding documents, sorting photographs, tidying away linen etc. Each moment a poignant reminder that these things belong with me now.

So I sleep as much as possible, to allow myself to process all these emotions. I watch the Olympics to distract myself and sit in the garden, catch up with friends. Watch the incredible Mo Farah fall and get up in his race and go on to win gold. Seems a metaphor for me in there somewhere.

Music helps too – listening to my favourite Bach cello number makes me cry, but that’s good too. And then Chumbawamba‘s rousing anthem Both these pieces express different bit of how I’m feeling and coping/not coping. Put them both on loudly over and over.


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